The First Year

Be Supportive. You're likely to hear about any number of problems during your child's first semester. College students usually call their parents for reassurance when things aren't going well - They call their friends with the good news. If you get upsetting late-night phone calls, try to be a good listener. Encourage your child to use the appropriate campus resources, such as Student Development Services.

Be an anchor. With all the changes they are experiencing, students want things at home to stay the same. Keep your child informed about changes at home, whether it's a younger sibling's move into their old room, an illness in the family, or the death of a pet. Your child needs this information in order to feel secure and maintain a sense of trust.

Recognize that college has changed. Although century-old college buildings look untouched by time, college life today is very different from the campus scene 25 or 30 years ago. Try to avoid saying, "When I was in college..."

Ask about courses rather than grades. Grades are not the only indication of learning. Invite your child to share with you the discovery of new ideas, academic interests and intellectual passions.

Send care packages. Early in the year, sharing popcorn or chocolate chip cookies from home can be a wonderful way for a student to meet dorm mates. Family photos can be comforting reminders of home. Holiday decorations, treats at exam time, and even common necessities such as shampoo or quarters for the laundry machines are thoughtful gestures. Surprise your child with a care package in January or February - a down time on many campuses as students settle in after vacation.